Daily Laughs 3

Definitions

SCHOOL: A PLACE WHERE PARENTS PAY FOR KIDS TO PLAY

LIFE INSURANCE: A CONTRACT DESIGNED TO KEEP YOU POOR ALL YOUR LIFE SO YOU CAN DIE RICH.

TEARS: THE HYDRAULIC FORCE BY WHICH MASCULINE WILL POWER IS DEFEATED BY FEMININE WATER POWER.

MARRIAGE: AN AGREEMENT IN WHICH A MAN LOSES HIS BACHELOR DEGREE AND A WOMAN GAINS HER MASTERS.

YAWN: THE ONLY TIME SOME MARRIED MEN GET TO OPEN THEIR MOUTHS.

LECTURE: THE ART OF TRANSFERRING INFORMATION FROM THE NOTES OF THE LECTURER TO THE NOTES OF THE STUDENT WITHOUT PASSING THROUGH THE MINDS OF EITHER.

CRIMINAL: A PERSON NO DIFFERENT FROM THE REST..............ONLY THEY GOT CAUGHT.

BOSS: SOMEONE WHO IS LATE WHEN YOUR ARE EARLY AND EARLY WHEN YOU ARE LATE!

DOCTOR: A PERSON WHO KILLS YOUR ILLS WITH PILLS THEN PROCEEDS TO KILL YOU WITH THE BILLS.

POLITICIAN: A PERSON WHO SHAKES YOU HAND BEFORE ELECTIONS AND YOUR CONFIDENCE AFTER.

ETC: A SIGN USED TO MAKE OTHERS BELEIVE YOU KNOW MORE THAN YOU ACTUALLY DO.

EXPERIENCE: THE NAME MOST PEOPLE GIVE TO THEIR MISTAKES

CLASSICS: THE NAME GIVEN TO BOOKS THAT NO ONE READS

PHILOSOPHER: THE NAME GIVEN TO FOOLS WHO TORMENT THEMSELVES THROUGH LIFE.................TO BE WISE.